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A snowy field

In a call this week, one of my clients and I were talking about how easily 'big decisions' can appear to be a 'fork in the road' in our metaphorical journey through life, but how in reality our path is not a marked road, but rather one that we decide for ourselves.

This photo from Unsplash depicts two 'one way' road signs pointing perpendicular to each other.
Life decisions can seem like an irreversible choice between two very different directions (Unsplash)

Perhaps a better metaphor is a field covered in virgin snow. As you progress through life you can see the path behind you that you've trodden, but the way ahead remains for you to decide. In fact, there are an infinite number of routes to the other side: if you divert your route to avoid a tree or just on a whim you might head towards the right side of the field and this may feel quite resolute in that moment.

This photo downloaded from Unsplash shows a snow-covered hillside with a few pine trees and a single line of meandering footprints leading to the camera
You decide where you go next. It doesn't need to be a straight line (Unsplash)

However, there is nothing to prevent you from changing direction and heading back to the left side to cover the very same ground that you might have walked on had you originally turned left instead. If you find that your chosen route isn't working out, you can usually even retrace your steps back a little and un-do the decision.

The same applies to many choices in life: should I leave my job for a new one? Should I leave my city and try somewhere I've always wanted to experience? Should I end this relationship?

The nagging doubt might often translate as 'what if I regret my decision? What if I miss what I'm leaving?' In most cases, with a little effort you can return to your old job, move back to a city you know and love and even convince an old partner that you miss them and want to get back together. Many of us feel some feelings of shame about admitting that we want to go back to something we chose to leave. We worry that people will judge us and even that old friends/ our old employer/ our ex may reject us for having left in the first place. In reality, it's a strength to say I've tried something new and it made me appreciate what I had before. And of course, there is a strong chance that you will prefer the new thing and choose to stick with it.

Whatever happens you will know yourself better after testing new experiences and opportunities. Test, evaluate and choose again. Very few decisions are irreversible if they turn out not to be what you hoped they might.

If you're facing a life decision and you're finding it hard to take the leap or to decide what to do then please SEND ME A MESSAGE.

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